THE wife of a man who vanished nearly nine months ago has spoken publicly about her trauma for the first time.

Hilary Venables does not know if her husband, David, 68, is dead or alive. She last saw him on June 28 last year when she left their Fyfield home to spend the weekend babysitting for her grandchild.

And although he had never sent a text message to his wife in his life within two days of his disappearance nine messages were sent to her from his mobile phone.

Police do not believe that Mr Venables was the sender with the mysterious messages having formed a key part of their investigation.

When Mrs Venables returned home on the Sunday there was no sign of her husband, yet suitcases which they had packed for a special holiday to Cyprus - to celebrate Mrs Venables's 65th birthday - were still in a bedroom, along with medication for Mr Venables who has suffered from Parkinson's Disease for ten years.

He meticulously sorted his daily medication, but did not take any of it with him when he disappeared.

Speaking exclusively to the Guardian, Mrs Venables said: "There's no reason that I can think of for him to leave. If he was going, he had four days to plan it.

The cases were packed, his medication was there, all he had to do was pick them up."

Detective Sergeant Liz Roberts, pictured, said: "The messages have certainly formed part of the investigation. Dave did not text his wife. This was the first time a text had ever come from his phone to his wife's.

"There were nine in total - one (of which) was blank and a couple repeated the same text."

After the ninth message Mrs Venables sent one back asking Dave, is this really you?' but no other messages have since been received.

Det Sgt Roberts said: "We don't know who sent them but we suspect it was not David Venables. It was certainly from Mr Venables's phone. One simply said Hired', one read Working' and another asked how the kids were."

Mr Venables, who has two daughters aged 46 and 43, would drive his London cab to the City most days, usually heading for Kings Cross.

His Hackney carriage cab was found in an underground car park in the St John's Wood area of London in early July.

Mrs Venables, who met her husband 50 years ago this April, said: "The constant question is what happened to him?' If he's dead where is he? Every time I go home I expect him to be there. I adore him - I love him and want to know what's happened to him. I've got no control over the situation.

"I think something has happened to him. There's no reason why he wouldn't have come home. We have had a fine marriage, we were always happy together."

As part of the investigation, the family home has been searched and a computer checked, and Mrs Venables has had to give her fingerprints and DNA. Her friends have also been interviewed.

Mrs Venables, who said she was too distressed to have her photograph taken by the Guardian for this article, said she understood why police needed to investigate all avenues, but she found it difficult to admit to herself that he might not be alive.

"My coping is wafer thin," she said. "People say I cope - but I've lost a lot a great deal of weight. I was very depressed when he first went. But instead of popping pills I took up exercise.

"We're a close family, it has been very difficult for me.

"I don't believe he didn't intend to come home. I think something stopped him coming home. Sometimes I think he's dead, other days I think he's alive, that's the terrible part. It's nine months now. (If he is dead) I won't be able to look at his face and say goodbye."

She added: "I just can't believe he didn't come home. I'm missing him like mad. I'm desperate to know what happened to him. If he is alive and well I wish he would contact me as my daughters and I cannot move on with our lives."

Police have renewed their appeal for information and want to trace a man who was captured on CCTV at Canary Wharf Tube station. It is suspected that he is connected to Mr Venables' disappearance.

Speaking about the investigation, Det Sgt Liz Roberts said: "It is certainly not closed. We will be putting a file together and will submit it to the Crown Prosecution Service and in the meantime the inquiry continues.

"She (Mrs Venables) is naturally very upset but she needs to know what has happened to her husband. It's the not knowing. If he is dead she wants his body back."

A 50-year-old man and a 54-year-old woman, both from the north west London area, arrested on suspicion of murder had their police bail extended until April 9 when they answered their bail date last week.

Anyone with information about the case should call police on 01279 641188.